At Sanctuary Canyon Ranch, we’re currently experiencing a gratitude reset. The term came to me today when Jake and I were talking about how lucky we are that we have everything we have in our life right now—even though that list of things currently doesn’t include water to our house. At least, not much water. Not enough to say… shower. Or do laundry. Or flush toilets. We also don’t know when exactly it’ll be back. We’re hoping within the next week, and it’s already been almost 6 days.

But no one has gotten upset. No one has yelled. No one has cried.

After some minor frustration, believe it or not, we’re both even more grateful right now than we normally are. That’s why I christened this a gratitude reset. We keep talking about how grateful we are that at least we have power. And that we have at least more water than we had last week and we get to wash dishes now. Or how awesome it was that our guest for this past four-day weekend was such an amazing friend that he didn’t even blink an eye about the fact that he had to fill the back of the guest bathroom toilet every time he flushed and never once complained he couldn’t take a shower during his entire trip.

It got me thinking about the house fire I experience back in 2008 when I lost everything. It was a major turning point in my life. I could’ve felt sorry for myself because the house we’d spent six months remodeling had burned to the ground 30 days after we moved in and I ended up living in a camper for 10 months in my driveway. But I didn’t. I was so freaking grateful to be alive because I could have easily died that day, if not for my incredible dog Brooklyn. I was so grateful that no one I loved died and that all my pets were fine. I turned into a gratitude rock star during that very difficult time in my life. When people would say stuff about it a year or so later, I’d tell them it was the best thing that had ever happened to me—and I meant it. I got a whole new house and all new stuff. It might have been challenging to wade through the sucky parts, but at the end of the day, my life was even better than it had been before. Plus, I held onto that attitude of gratitude, which is worth more than gold, and it helped all my dreams come true.

Unexpected stuff happens in life. None of us see it coming. Like the time Jake drove into Joplin, Missouri twenty minutes before an F-5 tornado ripped a mile-wide stretch through town, destroying his home while he was in it and killing hundreds. That day changed his life. He was grateful to be alive and that his parents—who lived across the street from him—were also alive. He couldn’t feel sorry for himself because so many other people were worse off than him and his parents. Instead, he became a different person than before that tornado. Everything awesome that has happened in his life happened after that fateful day.

When I told Jake this situation was a gratitude reset—just like those of our past—both of us immediately felt infinitely grateful that we were only dealing with the minor inconvenience of not having water. We’ve both been through some really hard times in our lives, and one thing we both brought out of those times was an attitude of gratitude. After those hard times, our lives both changed dramatically for the better, and I know it’s because of the gratitude the hard times ingrained in us.

We don’t always get to consciously choose what happens to us, but we always get to choose how we respond to it. The thing that has served me best through all my life experiences is finding something to be grateful for, even amid the hard stuff. It helps. A lot. Doubling down on an attitude of gratitude has helped me more gracefully navigate the rough waters of life than anything else.

So what if we have to have a new one-quarter mile-long trench dug four feet deep, through asphalt, and a bunch of other stuff? At least we have the money to pay for it. At least I can wash my hair in a bucket in the shower for our photoshoot on Sunday. At least we have hot food. At least we don’t have more guests coming for two weeks. At least I wasn’t injured by the car accident that happened 10 feet in front of me yesterday. At least, at least, at least… I could go on and on and on about the million little things I’m grateful for right now. It feels like I’m grateful for more stuff than I ever would’ve thought of last week, even though I practice gratitude every day.

Hence, why I’m calling it the gratitude reset.

The next time you’re going through a challenging time or facing something that sucks, ask yourself if it could be a gratitude reset for you. It’s a powerful mindset shift. It may not change the circumstances you’re facing, but it’ll shift your focus onto all the positive things in your life, which somehow makes everything feel rosier despite what’s happening. The more extreme the situation, the more you can actually find gratitude most of the time.

I can’t tell you how grateful I am for this gratitude reset. My attitude of gratitude is firmly in place and more powerful than ever before. Nothing about this situation can make me get upset or feel sorry for myself. I refuse. Instead, I choose to rest firmly in the grace of gratitude and use this experience to catapult me into more dreams becoming reality. Because that’s what gratitude does—help manifests a life so wonderful you didn’t even know it was possible. At least, that’s been my personal experience.

As my 99-year-old grandma said a few months before she died, “Life isn’t so bad if you just don’t feel sorry for yourself.”

PS. If you’re going through something tough right now, do yourself a favor and listen to one of my very favorite songs: Bob Marley’s Three Little Birds. (On repeat. And believe it.) It helps. ❤️

Sending you all my unshowered love,